During the 1980s when I was in my twenties, I was in a number of very passionate relationships. It might have been I was “addicted to love” in some respects. It did seem to act like a drug in a lot of ways, with incredible highs while under its influence, and horrible–sometimes suicidal–lows when going through withdrawal. I previously posted a selection of my early love poetry and promised to post the related heart break poems in another installment. This is that installment.
The selection starts out with a few that might be described as a bit sad, but it gets a little darker from there.
Go So Well
We go so well together –
I want you in all kinds of weather….
I want you when the sun is shining bright,
I want you in the middle of the night.
I want you when the rain is falling down,
I want you when the snow is swirling ’round.
It’s too bad I want you so
just when you have to go.
—
Drawn into the Darkness
Drawn into the darkness
by a siren crying out
like a prehistoric creature
in the night.
I walk lightly
(and sometimes leap)
’til I am lost
in a multitude of stars.
All is…
fear and
magic and
excitement and
surprise and…
at last, I find you!
I see you
calling out to me…
reflecting moonlight
on the ocean…
smiling and
waving and
winking and…
floating away in a bottle.
—
Interrogatives
Who do you call
when your back’s against the wall
and you think you’re gonna fall?
What do you do
when you know it’s up to you
and you haven’t got a clue?
When did you find
you were left in a bind
in a sad state of mind?
Where do you go
when there’s no one that you know
and you’re feeling kinda low?
Why do you think
you’ve been pushed to the brink
and your life’s in the sink?
How can you play
at the end of the day
when they’ve taken you away?
—
Rainbows and Clouds
Simply smiling in a rose garden.
Sitting on a swing
at the end of a rainbow –
My lady and I
holding hands.
Later…
Riding on the top of a cloud
in an icy high wind
with the wild eyes of night
screaming across the sky –
trembling.
—
Magic and Death
There is magic!
There is magic in excitement.
There is magic in surprise.
There is magic in this moment.
There is magic in your eyes.
And…
There is death!
There is death in this excitement.
There is death in this surprise.
And there is death in this moment,
as I stare into your eyes.
Our lips meet
in a kiss
of cyanide.
Shall I die loving you
or
shall I die in disguise?
—
Drowning
Gasping at a spindrift of implications
and…
grasping for your floating influence,
I flail air and water
to no avail….
When I tire, the sea will have me.
—
Destroyed
Destroyed –
Almost beyond recognition,
grasping at comprehension.
Lost –
Directions without reason –
wasted, sick, and beaten.
Hopeless –
crushing total despair.
Vast potential unvented,
vanquished before his time.
Marks go unmended,
mutilated in his prime.
Spoilt –
Scared and spent,
crying.
Young –
Yet old and dying.
Withered –
Wrinkled in waiting,
eyes twinkle fading.
Alone –
The lights go out and
no one is there.
—
Hell
Hell is forever sitting at the gates of Heaven
watching with burning desire
the unattainable possibility of you love
I shall return to the world
though…
no joy is left.
—
Apathy and Death
Coffee boiling as I slip away,
Cigarette burning in the ashtray.
Laying, looking at the TV set,
Apathy and death.
Apathy and death.
—
Death
Death comes to those who wait in tiresome places —
crawling through collapsing spaces —
leaving vague traces —
and silently slipping away.